Thursday, October 30, 2008

Falling short

Today I have been thinking about the many ways I fall short of what I truly want to be. If you know me, you know that I don't have the GREATEST self-esteem in the world and I tend to beat myself up on a regular basis (I think most women do this). But that's not what I'm doing right now. I am thinking about the ways I fall short because I've run across some inspiration to do better.

My best friend Kim is a year older than me, so she got to Stetson before I did. One of her very first friends when she arrived on campus was Brian Douglas. I was able to meet Brian when I visited campus the Fall of my senior year. When I arrived in the Fall of 2000, I immediately had some acquaintances, which was nice. I was able to meet Brian's then-girlfriend Jordan, his friend Adam, and another friend of theirs whose name I can't remember, but we were convinced he was a Jedi because he could seriously climb up completely vertical walls with nothing to hang onto. Now that I look back, this group was the group I SHOULD have gotten to know better. They were all Christians and hilarious and just kind, in general. Oh, to go back and live life over again--but I digress. I did not know any of these people that well, but thought (and continue to think) very highly of them. Through the magic of Facebook, I have been able to "friend" Brian Douglas. Through his facebook, I have stumbled upon his now-wife, Jordan's blog. What an amazing woman of God. I so admire her for everything she has been through and the way she has allowed the Lord to carry her and use her. Through her blog, I found some great money-saving blogs. I will do my best to add them to my blogroll for your enjoyment :) And please, please, check out Jordan's blog. Her story is wonderful and I really enjoy reading what she has to say. She is an inspiration to me as a mom and wife, and reminds me that I can do better.

In other news, please keep Kayla in your prayers--she is one of our former youth group members, 16 years old, and just had a baby. He is still in the hospital with Jaundice. I was blessed to run into her today and she is doing well, but has limited support and resources.


Tuesday, October 21, 2008

How and Why

Hi there! It's been a while! I haven't been blogging recently, mostly because of the fact that anything I want to blog about might get me excommunicated from my family and/or cause my husband to lose his job! SO...I will refrain from blogging about those things (you're welcome, Josh) and blog about other interesting things. :)

As you may know, my little family only has one vehicle, a 1995 Ford Taurus. We've had "Bertha" for over a year now, and she is thriving. Really, she's not a bad car. She runs great. There are obvious challenges with having only one car for two people and a baby. First, we can't always be two places at once. We have to travel together to a lot of things, or one person has to be dropped off and picked up, or one person just stays home. Usually, that's me. I walk with Zeke in the stroller if I need or want to go somewhere during the day. Josh usually takes the car to work in the morning, but he occasionally rides his bike so I can have the car. People we know sometimes see him riding his bike either to or from work, and will call one of us or catch us when they normally see us and make a comment such as: "ha ha, I saw Josh riding his bike while I was driving to such-and-such-a-place" like it's so cute and funny that he rides his bike to work. These comments rank right up there with ones like:

* "Did someone hit your car?"
* "Did you know that you have a huge dent in your car door?"
* "Why did you get rid of the Mazda?"
* "Oh my goodness! Someone hit your car!"
* "If I were you, I would've kept the nicer car"
* "How's that car running for you?"
* And on and on and on......

As you can probably tell from my tone, I am not fond of any of these comments. So here is my answer to some of them...

Yes, you did see my husband riding his bike to work. He did this so I could have the car today and not go out of my mind staying inside the house with the baby all day. I am thankful for this today, and am honored that Josh would humble himself to ride his bike for me. But I wish he didn't have to. He doesn't do this ENTIRELY by choice, so I don't think it's funny or cute, and I don't think you should think so either. One of the reasons we have one car is so I can stay home with Zeke. We don't have a car payment, our insurance is cheap, and our car is NOT nice. You should not think this is cute or funny. Many of you don't realize that Josh does not make a whole lot of money in these hard times. We are extremely fortunate that he even has a job. Yes, we know that our car has a LOT of dents. We have no idea how they got there, because we bought the car like that...on purpose. It was what we could afford at the time, without taking out any kind of loan. Yes, someone hit our car. MANY people have probably hit our car. The only person we know for sure hit our car is the woman who hit it TWO HOURS after Josh bought it, completely destroying the bumper. Yes, the duct tape is on there for a purpose, not just because Josh has an awesome sense of humor. Again, you should not think this is cute or funny. Living on one income and sharing a car is HARD. Following God's will into His service is HARD. It requires that you give up a lot of things, like a car, or extra money, or furniture. Is it worth it? ABSOLUTELY. But the next time you see Josh riding his bike, please don't call us or tell us that "ha ha, I saw Josh riding to work." Tell him how awesome it is that he is willing to give up a lot of social status so his wife and child can be together all day. And say a little prayer that he stays safe while he's on the road--he's already had one accident while riding home from youth late on a Wednesday night. Don't make comments about our car--we're proud of that car, even though it's not pretty to look at. Say a little prayer that it keeps running, because it's the only one we've got and we don't have a whole lot of money to have it fixed! If you see me walking somewhere with Zeke in the stroller, like the gym, or The Daily Grind, or Chick Fil-A, don't honk your horn. We can talk about you seeing me walking when I see you next, and I'll tell you all about where I was going and my experience while I was walking (because something interesting ALWAYS happens to us while we're out!)...but at the moment I'm too busy trying to ignore the other people who honk and whistle and yell obscene things out their windows and keep me and my baby safe to wave!

I know someday God is going to bless us with another car and the finances to provide us with all the things we are currently doing without, but right now I wouldn't have our life any other way. I don't want another car or more THINGS. And I would appreciate your help to keep me content. All the questions make me feel like we "should" have more/nicer things. Right now we have each other and time for our family...and that's enough for us.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Casey Anthony Indicted....
....But her hair and makeup look FABULOUS!